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life lately ; 08 - a week of recovery

This month has been... honestly? Very draining on the soul. I had two really bad mental breakdowns during the first two weeks, and during the third I came down with a terrible cold that put me out of commission for most of the week. My body was so achy and my chest was tight. My inhaler did what it could but I was pretty bedridden the whole time. Thankfully I tested negative for Covid, but the fact I haven't caught it yet when so many people around me have (literally as I write this, I find out the Queen has Covid.. the QUEEN!) makes me think it's almost inevitable that I'll get it eventually lol. I'm just glad that reality hasn't welcomed me yet.

Because of the pretty shit month I've had, I really felt like I deserved a nice break. A bit of me time, where I just do whatever I want to do without worrying about financial struggles or relationship insecurities or career failures. I recovered from my cold a just before the weekend and decided to do just that. This weekend was filled with indulgence, and I'm happy to share these moments with you.


 Taking short walks. Admittedly these walks happen mostly because we haven't done the weekly food shop this week as we were all down with the flu this week, so each morning since Thursday I've had to pop round the shops to pick up daily essentials like milk, fruit, bread, cat food etc. It was nice to get out the house after what seemed like years in bed dying. The cool air really helped get rid of the remnant of the flu, so I felt pretty refreshed when returning home.

My mum wasn't feeling too great this week either, so we kept each other company and sat in her room watching the most mundane things like Loose Women LOL. I've never bothered to watch it, but somehow we found ourselves commenting on the topics at hand and being pretty entertained. By chance I saw lots of people talking about a guy watching planes land at Heathrow Airport during Storm Eunice, and we somehow spent hours watching his live stream! He blew up pretty quickly and by the evening we were watching Big Jet TV live on Channel 4 and ITV news! It was hilarious, thrilling, and just a pretty sound time. Ended the day with some chips and fell asleep soon after. :')

I've put off sorting through my clothes since returning from New York over a month ago now, and I was so not looking forward to it lmao however, I really felt like it was time to go through it all. I had a huge pile of clothes that didn't fit into any of my draws and I knew it was just because I hadn't organized them properly (and because I left my wardrobe in a state while packing for the trip..). I took everything out, rolled them all up neatly and managed to fit everything in! My next task will be to go through each item and decide what needs to be donated to charity and as hand me downs to little cousins. I'll leave that for spring cleaning next month.


Catching up on the small backlog of posts I couldn't write while I was sick and depressed lol. I don't like writing about the good times when I'm not truly feeling that way. Unless I'm in a position where I'm able to write in a concise way about my mental health, I don't like to post during those rough periods. I think it's better for me when I read back on my posts to learn something from those not so happy posts, rather than to relive a mental breakdown. As for my happier posts, I have a lot planned out, and pretty much nothing to do today, as I've told myself not to think about work related tasks this weekend, that's what Monday's are for!


📚 Reading

I haven't been reading a lot this month, simply because I can't focus on reading when there's so many things on my mind. I end up thinking about something the makes me a little down, so I consume more visual content on my down time. I've been reading Strange Weather in Tokyo over the last couple of weeks now, and while the premise is interesting and I enjoy the dynamic the two main characters have, I find the pacing really really slow. I had a similar problem with the book After Dark by Haruki Murakami and I've come to the conclusion that these slow paced books aren't for me. I don't like reading different books all at once as I like to finish a book before starting a new one, but I'm excited to finally read The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo! It's been on my plan to for ages, so I'll be diving into that one later tonight!

Although I didn't have the mental headspace to write blog posts, I enjoyed spending my mornings and evenings reading lots of blog posts. On: Love in my late twenties really helped me navigate my feelings on valentines day, enough to make a post about it. Sade does a great job at letting you relate to the post, I definitely saw myself in her stories. Michelle's post on how to be consistent with blogging is something that I will refer back to from now on. While I know a few of the tips already, it's great to have the reminder and learn other useful ways to improve my blogging journey. I adored Hannah's B&M haul post! I love to see posts that remind me so much of the blogging scene way back when I first started blogging. I love having a nosey through people's purchases and the mugs were so cute! I adored this post from Wit & Delight, and I can't help but dream of a comforting life just like this.


🎮 Playing

Being an fan of idols for over 10 years, you can't help but think that you could manage an idol group and run a company better than Akimoto Yasushi or Lee Soo Man, but Idol Manager does a good job at showing you it's not that easy... Unless you're me of course lol. I've spent almost 300 hours in this game, and with a steady 25 in game years, almost 100 idols, and 44 billion yen in game profit, I'm inclined to switch careers from a fashion stylist to the UK's biggest idol manager. Simon Cowell who? Give me a few years and I'll build the biggest idol empire the western music industry has ever seen! Seriously, this game is fun, and I feel like every idol group manager needs to speak directly to me before making a decision on their groups lmao /delusional 

I'm not really a mobile gamer, I tend to be obsessed with a game for a few weeks and then completely forget about it once I've found a shiny new toy to play with. It sounds horrible but I'm literally that "i don't want to play with you anymore" meme. Matchington Mansion is the only mobile game that I've played consistently for over a year now. I enjoy playing it at night as a way to wind down from the day without using social media but still on my phone. It's a simple puzzle game that increases in difficulty with each level. It has monthly tasks to collect really cute items for your mansion, and you can help your team win prizes for more in-game items. I'm over 1500 levels in and I'm still no where near to completing my mansion! It's definitely a game you can play for ages.


📺 Watching

Although people advise against going on social media immediately after waking up, I watch Tiktok's almost immediately after! Hear me out. My Tiktok feed and for you page is filled with people romanticizing their lives, making aesthetics out of the mundane, and providing me with quick serotonin boosters and a positive outlook on life to start the day with. After watching these videos, I feel much more ready to take on the day ahead, much more than if I scrolled through Instagram. My feed also includes funny videos, recipes, current trends (great for my field of work), and lots of cats. It's an easy way to inspire me to get out of bed, stretch, and start the day. I recommend curating your feed to be filled with positivity!

I was binge watching Euphoria one day and while I really enjoy it, it wasn't the best thing to be watching while my mental health wasn't the best, so I looked through my list of things to watch and decided on The Crown. I'm not particularly interested in the royal family, but I needed something I could easily digest and scroll through wiki whenever something interested me. It's actually pretty enjoyable, especially when you recognize some of the moments in history. It's also rather educational, there's a few things they didn't teach us in history or geography class which would have been interesting, like the fog or the landslide. It's cool researching more on the topics after each episode, and I find myself enjoying the time I spend watching the Queen grow into her role.

The Olympics doesn't interest me as much as the Winter Olympics does, and I really enjoy watching it! The snowboarding events are so exciting, and the bobsleigh is pretty fun too, even though I don't understand any of the technique apart from "gotta go fast!!" lol. I even enjoy the curling! It's actually one of my favourites. As much as I adore Figure Skating, this event was really tarnished by the doping scandal, judges over scoring on jumps, and my beloved Yuzuru Hanyu's unfortunate accident during the short program. Despite it all, I did enjoy watching the Gala this morning. After all the drama, it closed off with all the skaters coming together with a smile. I can only hope the figure skating industry can reform in the coming years, otherwise it will be difficult for people to watch it without feeling bitter.


🎧 Listening

Taeyeon came out with a new album and I'm obsessed with most of the songs, especially the titular track INVU. It's quickly become a repeated track and I've already got some album tracks wedged into my spring playlist that I'm still working on for 2022. I've also really been enjoying YAOSOBI's new album THE BOOK that was released early last year, but I started listening to it again after seeing jpop group The Rampage (EXILE) performing Gunjo on a music show lol. It reminded me of how good the album was, so I spent the week putting the album on loop again. 

My winter playlist has been getting me through these colder months, helping me feel more relaxed and calm during my darker days, especially when the night comes earlier than expected. I named it 'coffee with gilmores', because I imagine myself walking around the streets of stars hollow with a cup of coffee from Lukes diner, on my way to work on a project out of town. I'm a little sad that spring is coming and I won't feel like listening to this playlist as much, because it's vibe is so distinct to the end of autumn and whole of winter. I'll continue to enjoy it until the weather warms up.

The windy weather from the storm means I can't take my usual walks through the forest, but I'll brave the weather for another quick trip round to co-op to pick up some more fruit, and probably some lunch. I'll finish tidying my room and get ready to enjoy a very lazy day reading more blogs, watching tv, and snuggling with my cats in bed. I hope you have a lovely Sunday!

This longer format of Life Lately posts were inspired by Chainyan!


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